A Letter to My Younger Self
Dear 18-year-old Jenise,
You probably can’t imagine this yet, but yesterday, we turned 32. I know. You probably think 32 seems so… ADULT. But really, it’s not that bad.
As a matter of fact, 32 might actually be a prime year for you. In the last year, you’ve achieved things you didn’t think you ever would – like run a half marathon (yes, I’m serious!), maintain a successful photography business while working from home, and reach many women, most of whom you have never met, via your blog. The next year only holds promises of even greater things.
You are married to this amazing man, Eddie (you’ve actually already met him and been on a date with him, but it didn’t work out just yet. Be patient.). He treats you like a queen and loves you probably more than you deserve sometimes. You have a beautiful home you have built together, and an adorable two-year-old boy named Caleb. He is the light of both of your lives. You have a dog named Bella, a Lhasa Apso, just like your first dog, Sassy.
The road here hasn’t always been the smoothest. But with faith, family, love and support, you’ve made it to where you are, and you have come out stronger on the other side. But I’d like to give you some words of wisdom, from yourself, a few years down the line.
Love your body. Your body will do some incredible things over the next couple of years. Those boobs you were ashamed of because they grew so fast and were never perky enough? They will nourish your baby for nearly TWO years. They will sustain him completely for the first 6 months of his life. You’ll carry your son in that belly that has never been quite flat enough, and there will be nothing on earth that will make you more proud of your body. Keep exercising – your body will do whatever you push it to do – including run 13.1 miles through Walt Disney World Resort. Feed it wisely – stop going through those drive-thrus and eating crappy junk. When you finally start to nourish it well, you’ll notice a world of difference. Trust me.
Stop chasing love. Love will find you. Or rather, you will find each other. And it will be sweet, and it will be fiery, and it will leave you weak in the knees. But the day you decide to make it a forever kind of love, will be the day where you are more certain of anything than you have ever been in your entire life. Stop stressing yourself out over love. It will come. And on that note…
Don’t put up with anyone mistreating you. This comes to guys and friends. You’ll have one relationship in particular that will challenge you and leave you with scars. Don’t let those scars get too deep. But if they do get too deep, don’t beat yourself up over it, for one day, they will heal (because you will find the kind of love that is perfect for you). Friends will come and go. Friends who you thought would be forever friends will slowly start to fade into the background and new friends will emerge. But anyone who mistreats you or disrespects you shouldn’t be in your life.
Don’t carve your path in stone. This monumental decision about your career? Go with your gut. You will have a successful run in a profession you love. But you will also find something else that you are passionate about, and you will hone your skills and become good at that. You’ll also find that running your home is a lot more work than you ever thought it would be, and you’ll adapt to life as a stay-at-home mom, too.
Trust your gut. At 32, it hasn’t steered you wrong. It will guide you on everything from your career, to your love life, to being a mother. People will try to give you advice about what you “should” be doing all the time. Your judgement will tell you which way to go. Trust it. You will always make the best decisions for yourself.
Accept yourself. Love yourself for who you are. Don’t change your personality because someone else said it was cool to be a certain way. At the end of the day, if you’ve been true to yourself, you will lay your head on your pillow every night and rest easy. Be your kind, level-headed, easygoing self. You’ll appreciate those traits more the older you get.
But most important of all, enjoy the ride. Life is so sweet. Savor every moment. Dance. Read. Hop on a plane. You’ll never regret living your life fully.
Love Always,